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Upright

by Katie Buttermore

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1.
If love is a fire, I wish to be a-blaze. I'd flicker high and low and burn a strong flame. I'd do all in my power to see everyone play the game. If love is a fire, I wish to be, we all should be a-blaze. If love is rooted, I wish to be the soil. Grounded all around with no threat that I would spoil. All the plants and fun-guys would embrace real loyal, yeah, if love is rooted, I wish to be the soil. So let's make -- love the baseline. Let -- your eyes meet mine. Let your smile... go full shine. and suddenly the storms clear as we hold dear the love that flows when we let it go free like the wind through the pines. suddenly everything has a touch of fresh that we can embrace to help each other be more kind. suddenly we wake up with smirks on our faces as we realize today has never happened before & all we have is time! might as well make it time to spread love, from the Earth below to every inch of the sky above! spread the love... spread the love... If love is a river, I wish to be immersed. Saturated & flowing with no movements rehearsed. Improvising to the fullest, each & every verse. Not worrying over where I need to go, I'm drowning out that ol' Curse! 'cause If love is in the air, I wish to be the wind. Each new ebb & flow is where I would begin. Breathing easy, taking chances freely, all is my kin. If love is in the air, I wanna be, we all should be the wind.
2.
Dragon Boy 04:38
it just seems that way, every once in a while, well, because everyone forgets to ask questions. and to seek answers. passiveness grows and spreads here like cancer. spreading everyone too thin. where's the room to grow? how do we begin? where do we begin, father, when we've got no real home? he said: start with today. explore the unknown. let yourself struggle through things and you'll see how you've grown. don't forget to smile at the little things. don't be daunted by a challenge. don't be afraid to sing! well. my plans are to spread the kind of love we don't reduce. but we reuse it. love is amplified when it's turned around to be reused. so let my love be amplified! if you are scared, let me in, i am your friend (let me in...) if you are sacred, show me your way. show me we are one, WE ARE ONE... i learn to love myself, i love to learn myself (x4)--i love to learn! i learn to love you, i love to learn you (x4)--i love to learn! well. my plans are to spread the kind of love we don't reduce. but we reuse it. love is amplified when it's turned around to be reused. so let my love be amplified! a dragon lives forever, so why can't little boys? how can painted wings and giant rings loose their place to other toys? night after grey night the dragon walks alone only to be forgotten to a boy with no real home. (he's got no real home) but my door is open, open, open. i've been hoping, hoping that you'd come in. come in, come in, come in, come in, COME IN. well. my plans are to spread the kind of love we don't reduce. but we reuse it. love is amplified when it's turned around to be reused. so let my love be amplified! my plans are to spread the kind of love we don't reduce. but we reuse it. love is amplified when it's turned around to be reused. so let my love be amplified!
3.
Attention to detail, the domes & pocks in a deer trail. Feeling gratitude in meditation -- make it real! Questing -- it's like I'm rewriting my own pre-quel. No right or wrong way to do this -- I cannot fail. Hearing the Snow Geese migrate South, reciting a fairy tale -- Delivering a message to those who decide to open their mail. Moving slow in isolation, learning from the Snail. Sleeping in debris, growing a snout & tail. For nothing is impossible or without meaning when you pay attention to the details. To my future self I'm linked with a cord, where anything is attainable & I'm never bored. Light as a feather is the dream, not stiff as a board! Flowing like water, like air, like fire, like dissolving war. the subtlties in everything shall not be ignored! I can shape me, I can shift me, spread my wings and be assured that I can be me, I can see me, I can alter the double-edged sword... So that it becomes a mirror, I can know me more clear which is honestly the best reward. The Moon up there while we do daily pirouettes, shows her curved surfaces a little more, then a little less. Inspriation for movement & shining light back on us, 2 mirrors back and forth, the view is marvelous So come on now & moon dance! Feel the gravity take you & release all your regrets. Sweep me off my feet & sweep out all the mess. Dust off your shelves & discover what's in them cabinets Turn it into gold in your mind & realize your abundance. (all this abundance...) So come on now & moon dance! i can shape me, i can shift me! i can be me, i can see me! i can shape me, i can shift me! i can be me, i can see me!
4.
Hope & I 04:43
hope and i are dear friends faith and i, we made amends grace and i, we meet from time to time to explore the depths patience sits beside, reminds me that there really is no end i just can't remember where i start, & where you begin see i'm not the kind of bird that's got some broken down wings i'm not the sort of girl that doesn't know how to fix things but there's a part of me that wants to get ahold of you a fleeting moment, our lives done changed ... i know we are not through this is not normal. i do not do this. but something shone through your eyes that i cannot just dismiss. see i know i lost my marbles, but i could'a sworn your gun was loaded i saw myself in its reflection, and i kept that duly noted. i know you meant one thing by that. but i'm talking the bullets of your words. straight from your heart and fingers, vocalizing your soul to the world. i am not just a woman. you are not just a man. and yeah i know i want things that i do not quite yet understand. and so I tend to sing in metaphor, I don’t often speak directly. but you can’t look at a girl like that and expect her not to think of you fondly! Now I lay flat upon a dusty floor where we stood. I told myself not to say these things, but I know in my heart, I really should 'cause hope and i are dear friends faith and i, we made amends grace and i, go dancing all along the mountainsides. sometimes late at night when i see some fire light, it's true i remember things i felt before... ... ... i think of you. see i'm not too proud to say that somedays i'm not a saint more like a sailor, cursing the odds that we can't just be what we ain't but i think of how things, are so much better than they could've been and so i praise the days i still get to say "i love you" to my friends. i recall your obsidian eyes, looking straight into mine when you sang to me, you sang to me that my eyes they shine real bright. yeah you & i were born right on down by the riverside. that's where i'll be, barefoot and smiling if you need a little light...'cause hope and i are dear friends faith and i, we made amends grace and i, we learn again not to break when we can bend. patience sits beside, reminds me that there really is no end
5.
Born in 44... toward the end of the war... Couldn't teach an old dog new tricks... When Poppa passed on, he was only-only-only-only 66... Just like his momma before him. before him. like his momma before him, 66. I was born in 88, so 22 when poppa born in 44 passed at 66... It was a trick of the trade to silently degrade. Giving to the lungs a perpetual downgrade. Smoking like a chimney, the cigarette's slave. Nicotine clutched at a young age. Developed the crutch for two packs a day. Meanwhile, I was busy being made. Born into the cloudy world of tobacco stains. where I'd post statistics to try and - try and save Poppa sister brother from their early graves. I'd cough, I'd wheeze, I'd yell like hell and proclaim "you're killing everyone, why don't you just quit today?" "are you gonna be around on my graduation day? ...i'd cough, i'd wheeze, i'd yell like hell... The thing I had to realize is that it wasn't about me. As I grew I was able to be at peace, even though I knew it was gonna consume every piece. if not him first, then possibly one of my siblings. The habit held strong. He didn't want to quit. He just dragged and dragged long. (dragged and dragged long) His guitar, I had to grab it, to figure out how to externalize these heart songs. And just like a rabbit, he may be outta sight, but not out of mind so I keep it strong... ...keep my mind strong... Now this girl bellows below the billowing chimney. Where fire has always provided the sweetest symphony. Poppa lives on as I sing from dusk to dawn, and in each verse I pray that my momma grow strong 'cause passed on now - is her husband, father of 5 of her children, Passed on now are her parents, & her baby first-born son. So as her youngest... what am I to do to re-affirm that they're not actually gone? With us, by us, through us move the Blessings from all of our loved ones Beyond! With us, by us, through us move the Blessings -- move the Blessings!
6.
my heart beats heavily, with the possibility of, syncing with another. my body feels the gravity, 'cause i'm starting to float right alongside another... you say i can call, you say i can call you, you say i can call you any time i want. that scares me, that excites me, that enlivens me to keep on callin' on ya. you seem so familiar, i can't quite place it. but i'm not concerned with categories & placements. the estrangment, from who i used to be, has got me tracing lines from all the tracks and stories and... ...all the what'ifs... all the what-if's. all the what if's. all... walk softly, quietly upon the, trail to my heart. i feel your traction, it's been building, it's been building from the start. well I'm- staying here in a bed, made for two. it ain't right, no it ain't true. i want you here!, i wanna feel your bones!, i want you here, you feel like home. so whaddaya say, will you- come be with me? will you walk these heights, will you sail these seas? i hear the coast is clear, let's go hide there. (x2) i wanna feel all the, shades of every color, that you speak so fondly of. i wanna feel---- i wanna feel... all the shades of you. crazy that we've only, only, only ever been apart. crazy this might turn into somethin 'cause you caught me off guard. i keep this close to, my heart not neglectfully spreading the words of our art. my heart beats heavily, with the possibility of, harmonizing with yours...
7.
I’m not asking for you to be in my dreams, Darling it’s been a while since this felt clean. We once dreamt of the world as ours to seize, Now the nights grow cold and I am not your queen. Please, even in my dreams, refrain from lying in my bed. Because it’s hard to keep track of all the waking words that you’ve said. It’s hard now to distinguish the different shades of red. It’s hard for it to be so easy in my dreams where you tread. It’s harder now to walk away [walk away] knowing I have been your thread. but We’ve overthrown the throne of our love (x3), & keeping secrets safe just isn’t enough. it isn't enough whoaa--- … I’ve lost my marbles!! Let ‘em roll free! (x3) roll free! I gave you a ride, you gave me nostalgia & butterflies (and someone new to think about at night) I gave you shivers, you gave me shivers. I gave you opportunity, you gave me confidence. I gave you melody, you done some medicine. But we’ve overthrown the throne of those nights (x3) & keeping secrets safe just isn’t right. it isn't right. whoaa--- … I’ve lost my marbles!! Let ‘em roll free! (x3) roll free! So what are you thinkin’ Lincoln? Ya got me California dreamin’ & we could run away – yeah me and you we could be sneakin’ creakin’ floor boards got me steadily creepin’ all through them blankets, & all through your weekend, over these oceans, over these nights there wouldn’t be those secrets to keep right and tight. don’t make a sound or they’ll be on the scent ebbin’ and flowin’, we’re not broken we’re just bent. learn from the spider the warp and the weft ‘cause once i run away there’s no tellin’ what’ll be left -- yeah takin’ stock of inventory but my marbles I’ve lost got-a couple screws lose, at a pretty high cost but I like how I function!, the resentment I’ve tossed! my hardware’s loosy goosy but I’m my own boss b-boss b-boss-boss… I’ve overthrown the throne of my mind (x3),… ‘cause for keeping track of all I’ve lost, psshh I don’ t have time. whoaa--- … I’ve lost my marbles!! Let ‘em roll free! (x3) roll free!
8.
Organic Love 04:43
Organic Love will allow us to grow with no harsh words or chemicals i know that we can grow strong, yeah we can grow old, just so long as we say so, we say so... Mother Earth, she will protect us, help keep us calm, cool, and collected, it's just that some people have neglected her, when she deserves to be respected. even in a room with the loudest noise, what rains through is --drops of your voice, sprinkling all over, i really have no choice, but i'd still choose you and your voice. yeah 'cause every ounce of what you speak is so enchanting, and every movement that you make seems like you are dancing. you are dancing... i may not be the prettiest to all the magazines, but to you i am gorgeous and you treat me like a queen. hey fella-- you can be my king, together we will, we will-- sing until the day breaks! sing until the day breaks -- and we be singing Ooo, Oooh OooOo OooOo oohh No need for the mixed messages. it only creates internal stresses. No need to calculate percentages. I'll tell you straight up, what's impressive is your attention to all the details. the way you move, patient as a snail and i like when you take your time with me, & you admire my relation with Coyote. i want you to know i'd give up any plans, if it meant making your sweet smile dance. grinning ear to ear, gonna give us a chance.
9.
The wind's a-blowin', don't know what direction, but i know it's coming on quick. strong and fierce, feel it in my bones. yeah, it really came on quick. it took me off guard this time. I'm so sorry that you // you feel this way. I saw you today but //...didn't know what to say. words don't come easy // the right words don't come at all. (2x) how long you been // weavin your web? (yeah) how long you been // stuck in your head? you dont have to forget in order to forgive you dont have to sacrifice in order to live you dont have to take in order to give said you don't have to forget in order to forgive! now i'm working to be kind // to everyone i meet. 'cause everyone has a hard battle // chompin' at their feet. i don't know if i can write, i don't know if i can wrong, i don't know if i can left, i don't know if there's a song. (Creator. I'm sending out my prayer...) Please shine light on // all of those who are // hurting today. Please shine light on // all of those who are // soul searching today. now i see a light at the end of the tunnel. so i'ma do my best to echo echo echo! that light that shines, in my heart i'ma echo! echo! echo!... i'm do my best to make it echo... now i'm working to be kind // to everyone i meet. 'cause everyone has a hard battle // chompin' at their feet. i don't know if i can write, i don't know if i can wrong, i don't know if i can left, i don't know if there's a song. The wind's a-blowin', don't know what direction, but i know it's coming on quick. strong and fierce, feel it in my bones. yeah, it really came on quick. it took me off guard this time.
10.
Momma take me, Momma take all of this pain away from me. Help me to be more Human, Happy, Healthy!
11.
Ways of Old 04:45
I know some young women. Who are following their Vision. Modern folk meet ancient wisdom. Coming together with collective decision. To bring back, bring back the ways of old. (x3) Honoring what they've been told. What kind of footprint will you leave on this Earth? Where has your attention been since birth? What do you turn to to quench your thirst? If you're coming in last, why not come in first? Grateful hearts are pounding their beats. Great Grandfather councils with Coyote. Great Spirit is a Great Mystery. Moving through all things, shifting me. to Bring back, bring back the ways of old. (x3) and to Honor, what I've been told. Go off on your own. Be who you're gonaa be. Love who you're gonna love. & live your life free. Going with your own flow. Might mean going against the grain. Just listen to them elders who remember. absorb their wisdom and their flame. (and) Bring back, bring back the ways of old. (x3) Honor, what you've been told. I know some young children. Who are living the Vision. Young bodies still full of wisdom. Bringing us back in touch by way of a graceful collision to bring back, bring back the ways of old (x3) to Honor what we've been told

about

Some motivation behind this is that I'd like to acquire funds so I can go to South Africa to learn animal tracking from the San bushmen, among other things. I've only traveled between Ohio and Oregon really, and it is time to expand my experiences.

"Upright" has been a reminder for me for how to live-- upright in my inter/actions, mind, and heart. Most of these songs are fueled by this reminder.

I'm truly blessed and humbled to be able to share this, and to have people in my life who continue to push me to be better.

credits

released September 25, 2015

All original songs.

All self-produced/mixed by Katie Buttermore except:

"Love the Baseline" -- recorded & mixed by Helen Vaskevitch.
Vocals, beatbox, trombone, background vocals: Katie Buttermore
Backup Vocals: Kaahele
Bass: Jordan Doll

"Dragon Boy" -- recorded & mixed by Helen Vaskevitch
Vocals, percussion: Katie Buttermore
Backup Vocals: Kaahele
Bass: Jordan Doll
Piano: Helen Vaskevitch

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Katie Buttermore Ashland, Oregon

I'm inspired by you.

My heart belongs to the wilderness. I'm planted now in Southern Oregon.

Thanks for listening.

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